Steamlings

Achievement Hunter: Alien

This ‘game’ is coming soon, but all the game info is there. I will mostly be analysing the developer themselves, so perhaps this should be more of a putilin_industries review.

First, let’s take a holistic look at the page.

alien.PNG

The first thing that could be done to improve this overall look is the Developer/Publisher name.

putilin_industries ?

At least make the name look professional. Get rid of the lowercase, get rid of the underscore. That already turned me off, because it looked incredibly unprofessional. And if you know even a little bit about me, it’s that I’m not the most knowledgeable about the intricacies of video games, especially Steam. But this is something even I can’t overlook.

Secondly, the screenshot. For the love of god – is this a Newgrounds game? Are we back in 2008? This is awful. It looks awful. Please, hire an artist. It doesn’t matter if you can’t draw. Someone out there can, for a small price to make your game look that much better.

Thirdly – what is that bio? I don’t like to be mean, but it isn’t that hard to get someone to proofread your work. Honestly, if this is how you publish your game on Steam, it just makes me think you don’t give a shit.

Don’t even get me started on the blatant title, which makes me think this is more an achievement haven than it is a video game. That would certainly explain the above.

 

Let’s take a look at the About section.

Capture

Unsurprisingly, the English here is just as stilted. If you’re going to put a game up on Steam, do put the minimal amount of effort in. That being said, I do find the ‘minimum allowable price’ part pretty telling about this game’s true motives, although I have to say, the ‘fearless protagonist’ game feature did elicit a dry laugh. How exciting – you get a fearless, flat, boring, soulless protagonist, whose world is an asset-flipped carbon-copy across all their other games.

Speaking of which. This developer has a whopping 19 Achievement Hunter games out (including a handful that are still Coming Soon). They are all cookie-cutter clones of one another, churned out at $1.19 for each game, and it’s totally gonna be worth every cent.

Look, I’m sorry. I’m not giving this developer a cent of my money to give this game a go. It’s already very clear from the screenshots and the host of negative reviews exactly how this game plays, and what its true reason for existence is. Literally the only positive reviews ever are about how easy it is to get achievements, and the ‘games’ themselves boast their 5000 achievements, with more unlockable bundles. In this case, do judge a book by its cover – especially when they didn’t even try.

This is an achievements bot, with not an ounce of video game in its blood, and this sort of trash needs to be cleaned off of Steam. Other, more deserving games, are getting lost in the masses of these shameless money-grubbers.

 

So please, putilin_industries. Piss off.

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